Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Another Day Goes By In A Blur

Today was a blur, I think because I had a headache. I've been reading all these books about people and the stupid evil things they do to each other. Miki was right ... knowing too much will just make your head hurt. My head does hurt.

I saw this on PostSecret and it made me laugh so hard ...
I wish I were a popular idiot instead of a lonely genius.

Maybe because I identify.

Maybe because I'm stupid and I wish I was a genius. I'd like to make everyone believe that I like to be different, but really I just have no idea how to fit in.

I am pretty certain now that the people at work really do not like me. Maybe it's that they think I'm out to get them or something but really, I just want to be happy at work again. I think that may be the root cause of all this depression is that I do not feel that productive at work these days. I mean, it's my third week and I'm yet to contribute a single line of code -- and that is what I supposed to be good at. Or so I like to tell myself.

Monday, May 30, 2005

My "workstations"

I took some photos of my computers at home and I thought I'd blog about them. Mostly homebrew systems I've built over the past few years -- one of them (the newest) is a Dell "server" I bought while it was on sale and did some upgrades. Here is the "pile" of machines:

The machines...

And of course, we have a few monitors, two perfect flat IBM 21" monitors...

Look at all those sweet wires!

And a 3rd, off-brand 17 inch we use for system monitoring programs and the XMMS display. Also, not pictured is our new Dell laptop -- also purchase on a steep discount and upgraded.

You can see the wireless access point behind the monitors in the first picture -- that exists pretty much too provide "all-over" internet access to the laptop.

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Party with Andrew and the Boys in Galway, Ireland

Sunday, May 22, 2005

Weakness is Opportunity

I finished my first week of the new job today at Standard Register. I am a "Senior Software Engineer" and things seem to be getting a lot better.

My remaining complaints include:
  • Only one Monitor
  • I have to use Visual Studio
To our destiny, to our power : Other Human's Weakness is Our Opportunity.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

New Job Pain

Well, two days down and an unknown number to go. Things have gone from worrysome to horrifying to depressing over the last 48 hours. As I get up to speed on how the "software" they wrote works, and this thing they call an "architecture", I get more and more frightened.

I think the last two days of stubling around in the dark have been more stressful than any at O'Neil -- at least at O'Neil I knew that I could make a positive impact and get things done. At Standard Register, I'm afraid that the damage (organizational damage) was done so long ago by so many clueless people that no one person could "fix" it, even with three years and a team of smart people.

Monday, May 16, 2005

New Job Starts Today

I started my new job today at Standard Register. I am a "Senior Software Engineer" and things seem to be really nice.

My complaints thus far include:
  • Only one Monitor
  • My Monitor is only 17"
  • I have a "mouse" (non-trackball pointing device)
  • I may have to use IE, not Firefox
  • I don't have a virtual desktop manager
  • I have to use Visual Studio

Things I love so far include:

  • I get to work for Shawn again
  • I get to work at a company that cares
  • I get to use C# / Mono
  • I make more money than before (some more)

Sunday, May 08, 2005

Did I Really Just See That?

I thought I knew this girl, or at least was getting to know her. The things I knew were good things. Then I saw her when she did not see me and now I know I knew nothing and what I might have learned wouldn't have been real anyway.

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Notes To Self

I Have A Type A+ Personality, and I need to learn how to deal with it...

Dear Self,

You're driven to succeed every single second of the day and you don't let up on your goals, no matter how tired you are. That is not always healthy.

You've already acheived a lot in your life... but it's not enough for you and you need to learn to accept your success, and appreciate yourself.

Always on the go, you tend to get things done quickly and effectively -- and when you don't, do not become so angry with yourself or with those around you.

Just remember to play a little too, even if play is the most difficult thing for you!

- Cory

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

New Magiks

Things I have become interested in recently:

  1. Perl On Rails http://www.perlonrails.org
  2. Ruby On Rails http://www.rubyonrails.org
  3. Catalyst http://search.cpan.org/~mramberg/Catalyst-5.10/
And of course, Mono http://www.mono-project.com/

Monday, May 02, 2005

Day of Reckoning

The Day of Reckoning is Upon Them. They have failed to heed the words of the Prophet, failed to see the Truth of the Day. The cost they must now bear is beyond them and I fear they will fail.